I’ve always said that medical doctors are my shamans, because physicians have saved the lives of my both husband and son once and my own life twice. I’ve even known people who have put off going to the doctor because they want to try a New Age type cure first who actually died from this. But I’m an open-minded soul (with all I’ve seen and heard, I HAVE to be!) and if a healer seems serious, I’ll give him or her a listen.
This happened to me during our recent Thanksgiving trip to Texas. I was having some strange stomach trouble and went to the doctor, who advised me, among other things, to give up all dairy products for two weeks. Well, don’t you know, we go to San Antonio and the first place we stop is one of our favorite restaurants, a kind of "dive" where they serve outstanding cheese burgers and greasy, cheese-y nachos. I was just finishing up the last nacho when I remembered that I wasn’t supposed to be eating cheese.
Then it seemed that EVERYTHING I ate or was offered had cheese either on it or in it: Eggs at brunch were covered with cheese, a delightful cheese plate was offered to us by one group of friends, homemade ice cream by others. I had pretty much given up when we visited the country house of an old friend and were offered a lovely lunch (with even MORE dairy!) and a chance to catch up with her three lovely grown daughters.
The oldest daughter is a bankruptcy lawyer who has always exuded an air of confidence and competence. Imagine my surprise when she confided to me that she has also become a healer. At first I wasn’t sure what I was hearing, but she went on to explain that she talks with a person first, to find out what emotions may be involved, then she "visualizes" the organs in the person’s body that are causing the trouble. I had a nice long talk with her. She isn’t a psychologist, but her mother is, and she’s clearly picked up lots of information from that source.
I explained that I thought my trouble might be the return of an old affliction that is partially caused by emotions (my doctor had diagnosed this as well). I had inadvertently "cured" myself the first time by handing the bill-paying chores over to Whitley. When I didn’t have to worry about finances, my symptoms suddenly disappeared–it was as if I went to one of those preachers who tells the people sitting around him in wheelchairs to stand up and walk.
My problems are different now–I tend to feel exploited and "used." Unlike my life in Texas, I feel as if nobody in California (where EVERYTHING is about business) likes me for myself–they only want to use me to get through to Whitley. I often feel like the ghost in the room–the one who is tolerated but not paid attention to. In meetings, I want to jump up and down in my seat, waving my hand in the air the way I did in elementary school, saying, "Wait, wait, I have a good idea too!"–or (in social situations), "Wait, wait, I’m an interesting person too!" This healer had a word for me: "retention." And she’s right–I’m keeping my emotions tucked deep inside because there’s nobody to share them with.
We talked for about half an hour, then parted. I appreciated her offer to help, but didn’t really believe anything would come of it. Then later that evening, I felt a sharp pain in the area of my body that had been bothering me. I had only felt tenderness there before, so this was something new. It only lasted for a short time, and then–I seemed to be healed! My symptoms all went away and I started to get well.
It’s just another of the many miracles that keep happening to me since I woke up from a coma seven years ago. It’s as if I shed my old life like a snakeskin and found a new world inside.
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