The new year is almost here, and most of us have made resolutions that we will fail to keep, such as losing weight or quitting smoking. Maybe this year, we should take an inventory of our lives instead.

Psychologist Frank Farley says, “In so many fields we take stock, we take inventory, we take a pulse at the end of the year. Sports commentators are going to be reviewing the year in sports and pundits will be doing the same for politics. Even businesses do an end of the year inventory and balancing of the books. But we are not so good at doing that about ourselves, reflecting and assessing how we?ve done this past year.” New years resolutions only reflect the ways in which we’ve failed?what about our successes? They need to be counted too.

The change of the year is a good time to try to repair relationships. Farley says it offers a good opportunity to forgive?whether it is forgiving a grudge or an argument?and start a fresh relationship with that person. “Doing it at New Years reinforces it with the other person,” he says. “At some other time of the year, the other person might think, ‘Why are they doing this now, what is their real reason for forgiving?’ But at New Years, in a sense, you have a license to do things like this; you have a license to rearrange or reestablish a relationship or just to forgive.”

One of the unique things about forgiveness is that it often helps the person who is forgiving more than the person who is being forgiven. He says, ?There are some studies that show that things like one?s anxiety and stress almost melt away when you forgive someone for something.”

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