Marriage is healthy--even more healthy for men than for women. Marriage also provides great psychological benefits for depressed people. Do men and women have different criteria when it comes to choosing a mate? And after you GET married, be sure to remember to say "thanks."
While humans may pride themselves on being highly evolved, most of us still behave like Neanderthals when it comes to choosing a mate. Although people claim otherwise, Scientific studies show that beauty is the key ingredient for men while women, the much choosier of the sexes, leverage their looks for security and commitment. This formula has served humans throughout time, with the model of choosy females reflected in most mammals.
Cognitive scientist Peter Todd says, "Evolutionary theories in psychology suggest that men and women should trade off different traits in each other, and when we look at the actual mate choices people make, this is what we find evidence for."
When it comes to marriage, researcher Adrianne Frech says, "Based on previous research, we hypothesized that people who are depressed would have worse marital quality and would therefore experience fewer benefits from marriage, but that is not what we found." In other words, getting married may work better than Prozac! She thinks this may be because marriage might provide a level of companionship that depressed singles typically lack.
Sociologist Robin Simon says, "The study's findings make perfect sense to me. One symptom of depression is loneliness and lack of companionship. I am not surprised that marriage would supply a psychological boost for the previously depressed." Chores are one of the top causes of divorce, along with sex and money problems. In LiveScience.com, Jeanna Bryner quotes psychologist Benjamin Alliant as saying, "The division of labor at home is probably one of the most frequent causes of conflict between couples." Why does one spouse always seem to get stuck with all the household chores?and why is it usually the woman? Researcher Jess Alberts thinks this is because women THINK more about what needs to be done domestically, because these were the types of chores they were assigned to do as kids.
But guys, even if you can't seem to remember to take out the garbage, there's a simple way to help solve this problem: say thank you. Bryner quotes researcher Benjamin Calwell as saying, "One of the things that can destroy a relationship is when you have small resentments that build up over time, and even small expressions of gratitude can make a significant difference."
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